Join my Facebook Support Group for those dealing with toxic exes and co-parenting struggles. Click here!

Single Mom Co-Parenting Support: How to Find Your Tribe

by | Oct 16, 2023 | 10 comments

The term “narcissism” on this blog is used to describe a specific set of personality traits. It is not intended to be used as a professional diagnosis.

When you’re struggling through the challenges of co-parenting in a difficult situation, it can be very lonely without single mom co-parenting support.

I remember when I started talking about parallel parenting with narcissists on the blog, it was really just something to do to sort through my own situation and get a few things off my chest.

I was absolutely shocked when those posts blew up, and I started receiving emails and comments from moms all over the world dealing with a similar situation.

And the more I talked about my situation, the more I discovered I had friends going through the exact same thing!

My point is that no matter how alone you feel, there are many, many single moms out there having similar experiences.

It sucks that so many of us have to deal with narcissistic exes while trying to raise our children, but it means that there is an entire support system at your fingertips – whether you are looking to find your single mom tribe in your community or online.

So let’s take a look at how you can find your single mom tribe and why having co-parenting support is important and beneficial:

The Benefits of Single Mom Co-Parenting Support

Before we get into how to find your tribe for single mom co-parenting support, let’s explore the why.

When it comes to difficult parenting relationships, having a support system is crucial for your mental and emotional health.

Not only can a support system help you with advice, but they are the perfect soundboard for your gripes and complaints because they can truly empathize with your situation!

When I talk to my friends about what I and my daughter have been through, those who don’t know really don’t know. Sometimes they act like the situation was just a nuisance for a while without truly understanding the impact it had on us.

And I don’t blame them! Parallel parenting with a narcissist or toxic ex is indescribable to those who have never experienced it.

Hell, I only started writing about parallel parenting with narcissists because I really had no idea what I was dealing with – writing about it helped me sort it out.

And there are other reasons why co-parenting support for single moms is super beneficial:

  • Reduce Isolation: Being a single mom is lonely, and being a single mom dealing with a stressful and chaotic co-parenting situation is even lonelier. Having people to talk to who understand can help you feel less alone.
  • Emotional Support: Co-parenting can be emotionally challenging, especially when you can’t voice your concerns or thoughts to your narcissistic co-parent. Having someone to talk to, share your feelings with, and lean on during difficult times is invaluable.
  • Practical Assistance: Having a single mom tribe is also amazing because everyone can lend each other a hand with things like childcare when you need it most.
  • Shared Wisdom: Learning from others’ experiences can provide invaluable insights into single parenting and co-parenting strategies, such as conflict resolution.

Having other moms to turn to when you’re struggling to co-parent with your ex is just amazing!

These are the people who are going to get it right away and will understand your need to get things off your chest.

They won’t judge you or consider you too complain-y. They’ll have the best advice for your situation and be able to share their own experiences and outcomes.

Identifying Your Needs and Limitations

Okay, so we went over the benefits of co-parenting support, but finding your tribe means understanding your own emotional needs and limitations.

Just because someone has gone through something similar to you doesn’t mean they will be a good fit when developing a friendship.

Some moms are still in healing mode, which means that they may not yet be emotionally capable of nurturing a friendship.

Basically, you don’t want to be someone’s punching bag. A co-parenting support tribe is all about mutual support and leaning on each other.

That being said, you don’t have to dismiss those who are still expressing their hurt or dependent on others to build themselves up again. Only you know how much you are capable of supporting someone else, and you can always maintain distance while still being supportive.

And if you’re still on that healing journey, understand that others may not be capable of providing you with the support you require right now – and that’s okay!

You will find someone who has made it through to the other side who can help you on your path.

Finding Your Co-Parenting Tribe

So, where exactly do you find this amazing co-parenting tribe?

Building a support system can take time as you meet new people, make connections, and nurture growing friendships.

But you have to start somewhere! Here are some avenues to explore to find your co-parenting support system:

Online

I actually run a Facebook support group for people co-parenting with narcissists and difficult exes! I share tons of advice there, and the members use it as a platform to ask for help or simply to vent.

I know it’s not the same as face-to-face interactions, but it’s a good starting point for finding moms who are facing similar challenges.

Click on the image below to check it out:

Community

You can always reach out to single moms in your area by using apps and websites to connect with other people.

I know the app Peanut lets you hook up with other parents in your area for playdates – this is a great way to get started.

(I’ve never used the app, but if anyone has, please leave a comment and let us know how it works!)

You can also look around for local parenting or co-parenting groups that host meetups, workshops, and playdates – or start your own!

Share Your Story

Or you can always do what I did and start sharing your story, whether you talk it out with other mom friends or start a blog.

Like I said, I was amazed at how many of my mom friends were going through the same situation, and I didn’t even know!

And it was amazing how our similar experiences brought us closer together.

So don’t be afraid to share your story – you never know who else needs to hear it.

(Just a word of caution, though: If you are dealing with a narcissist, they will use whatever they can against you. Make sure that if you do share your story online and publicly, you maintain a respectful tone and don’t give away any specifics. Don’t give them any ammo.)

Building and Nurturing Your Support Network

Again, building your support network takes time, and it isn’t just about connecting with others. It’s about nurturing those connections.

That involves fostering open and honest communication with your support network. Don’t be afraid to share your feelings, challenges, and victories – and encourage others to do the same.

You should also create a system for support where you can reciprocate help with other single moms, like childcare and playdates. This helps to build a mutual friendship that benefits everyone!

The Role of Family and Friends

Don’t forget about your existing friends and family! Even if they have never been in your situation, they can still be an amazing support system.

You just have to tell them what you need, whether it’s help or simply a shoulder to lean on. Without being open about your needs, this group of people may not know how to support you.

And maybe you’re looking for a co-parenting support group because you feel let down by family and friends, but give them a chance. Be honest about your situation and how you feel, and you may be surprised at how much they step up!

Overcoming Challenges

As you build and nurture your co-parenting support network, it’s important to be prepared for the occasional hurdle that may come your way.

Even the most well-intentioned people can come to misunderstandings or have disagreements – it’s perfectly normal!

These challenges are actually the perfect opportunity for growth and strengthening your friendship. Here’s how to tackle them:

  • Open Communication: Encourage open, honest, and non-confrontational communication. Remember, these are allies, not your ex, so doing this is okay! Listen to the other party and express your thoughts and feelings respectfully.
  • Review and Reevaluate: Every now and then, take a look at your support system. People’s circumstances change, and what worked in the past may not work anymore. It’s okay to reduce contact with people who make things difficult.
  • Set Boundaries: Single moms dream of having someone to help them out but make sure others are not taking advantage of your kind nature. Make sure your tribe respects your time and emotional well-being.

No friendship is ever going to be perfect.

My rule of thumb is that because I’m dealing with co-parenting challenges, I don’t need additional challenges. If someone begins to consistently add another layer of stress to my life, it’s time to set boundaries or let them go.

Otherwise, we all get a little needy or dismissive because we are all still walking our own healing path. The important thing is that we all give each other a little grace.

Single Mom Co-Parenting Support: You’re Not Alone!

So there you go. ???? Single moms in co-parenting situations don’t have to navigate this challenging path alone.

Finding your co-parenting tribe is all about building a network of understanding and compassionate people who can provide emotional and social support.

Don’t be afraid to seek out those connections, nurture them, and embrace the benefits they offer.

Share your personal co-parenting support journey in the comments below. How have you found your tribe? Your experience could inspire and help others in their co-parenting journey!

Related Posts:

Let’s create a supportive community and navigate the complexities of co-parenting with strength and resilience!

10 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Having a community of moms is essential!

    Reply
    • Chelsy

      Definitely is! I’ve learned so much from my mom friends. 🙂

      Reply
  2. Avatar

    Yes to all of this! I love my mom tribe and they are the ones that help keep me sane most days. Like you said, motherhood can be so lonely, but to have other women walking through it with you makes like so much better!

    Reply
    • Chelsy

      So true! I have my bestest (non-mom) friend for all my life stuff but when it comes to motherhood stresses, no one understands like other moms!

      Reply
  3. Avatar

    I heavily endorse each mom having a mom tribe, whether physical or otherwise. As a new mom, it was one of the only things that made the process easier.

    Reply
    • Chelsy

      Same! One of my good friends has kiddos a few years older than mine so she was a wealth of mom-related information!

      Reply
  4. Avatar

    Yes I completely agree finding a mom tribe is so helpful! Due to being military spouse I unfortunately didn’t have one with my 1st baby and it was hard always feeling alone. After my 2nd I really started connecting more with other moms and it has been such a blessing!

    Reply
    • Chelsy

      That must have been tough. 🙁 I’m glad you’ve found your tribe though! Better late than never! <3

      Reply
  5. Avatar

    After reading the book mommy burnout, I realized the importance of a mom tribe! It really helps so much to have other women who get your life around! We just moved so these tips are really helpful as I try to Gain a new mom tribe.

    Reply
    • Chelsy

      I hope they help you find a new mommy tribe! <3

      Reply

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Get In Touch!